Miss Alice Lovelady's Second Omnibus of her Inexplicable Adventures Read online

  With an impatient sound Badru’s mother indicated we needed to continue to follow her. With Shemei and Hasina to my front and rear, and the camels hiding us we did so.

  Our destination was a deep gap between two of the massive stone blocks at the base of the pyramid. It looked like just a dead-end but Badru’s mother stopped in front of what looked like the side of another plain stone block and pulled it to the side. From within her black clothes she produced a key and put it into a small black hole. Quite to my surprise it turned out that she’d unlocked a camouflaged door. Quickly pushing it open she ushered us inside.

  In comparison to the bright harsh sunlight outside, cool deep blackness welcomed us behind the door. As soon as Hasina slipped in, Badru’s mother closed the door. I felt someone’s hand grip my arm and pull me forwards as if they thought I couldn’t see, but my strange aetheric eyesight showed me faint purple outlines of our surroundings.

  With the sound of a match being struck light flared behind me. The glow of a lantern slowly increased helping my sight even more. Great stone blocks to either side and above us created a tunnel. This was most interesting.

  Badru’s mother held the lantern and passed us by to take the lead. I held my umbrella close as we headed along the tunnel and then down stone steps with again Shemei in front of me and Hasina behind. Quite what use I’d put it to whilst underneath millions of tonnes of stone was beyond me, but I wasn’t going anywhere without it.

  Hieroglyphics covered the stone walls and ceiling. How far would the tunnel go? Where would it lead to?

  I’d come this far, I was determined to see it to the end.

  Twelve

  My legs were beginning to tire and I hoped we’d soon come to our destination. I’d completely lost any sense of time and direction I had after all the steps down and steps up and the twists and turns our route took. We’d also passed by several other openings leading off the tunnel we took. Without anyone to lead me I’d be irrevocably lost. Were we even still underneath the pyramid?

  So it was with quite some relief that after going up yet another set of steps I found myself at the entrance of a large chamber with Badru’s mother smiling at me. Apparently we had arrived at our destination. I stopped in shock so quickly that Hasina bumped into my back. It was the chamber I remembered from my dream.

  Thirteen

  The lantern light only lit up a small part of the large chamber, but my aetheric eyesight showed me much more. I felt it prudent not to advertise the fact. What I saw was astonishing – the walls and ceiling were covered with the most beautiful hieroglyphics. With a sort of reverential awe I slowly walked around trying to see as much of it as I could. Badru’s mother accompanied me and I noticed Shemei and Hasina stay at the entrance. The air was dry and dusty, and stale like it had never been changed for hundreds of years. A faint note of old incense and charcoal tickled my nose.

  For the second time I stood still in surprise as I spied the end of the chamber and the throne in which I’d sat in my dream.

  “There,” I whispered excitedly, feeling like I was in a holy place and raising my voice would be an affront to some deity. “That’s where I was.”

  I hurried over the sandy floor towards it then stopped, remembering the dog-headed figure.

  “There was a figure. With a dogs head?” I turned to Badru’s mother. “And it did something?”

  Her dark eyes seemed to gleam in the lamplight, looking at me. “Yes.”

  With a wrinkled finger she beckoned me to follow her, which was towards the dais and up the few stone steps to the throne itself. I saw it was carved from stone and had human images carved into it. The main one was of a female with pink hair.

  Fourteen

  With excitement shining from her face Badru’s mother indicated I should sit down on the throne. But some strange feeling stopped me. This wasn’t right, this wasn’t my throne. If I sat in it something very bad would happen.

  I decided to avoid the issue by looking behind the throne. A huge image on the back wall of the chamber I’d not noticed before came into sight, some sort of confrontation between the female with pink hair and a human figure with a dog’s head.

  I swung back to look at Badru’s mother, questions in my face. “What is this? What does it mean? Why is this figure interested in me?”

  That took her aback, “You’ve seen it?”

  “Yes, when I arrived.”

  She turned back and yelled in Egyptian at Shemei and Hasina down the other end of the chamber. They hurried forwards looking like the world was about to end.

  “Where did you see it?”

  “At the airship dock when I arrived.”

  Speedy spoken Egyptian ensued between her and the two servants. The result of which was that Shemei hurried back towards the end of the chamber and out, while Hasina stayed put. What was going on?

  I was standing behind the throne, with its back to me. In the darkness I noticed a pattern of faint purple outlines running over it, looking like a spider’s web. At its centre wasn’t a spider, but a human figure.

  Badru’s mother noticed my interest in it and moved the lantern closer thinking to help me see it more clearly. “What is it?” she asked, peering at the back trying to see what I was looking at. But the faint lines faded from my vision in the lantern light. In normal light the back of the throne was just plain stone. What was going on?

  Remembering where the human image was I wondered if I could feel the pattern, but when my fingers touched the spot I almost cried out in shock as the figure sank slightly into the seemingly solid stone. At the base of the throne a block of stone roughly a foot long and an inch thick clicked out. Dust from it slowly fell to the stone floor. Badru’s mother jerked back in surprise.

  My heart was in my mouth as I reached down and pulled at the stone. It was a drawer. Lying on it was a beautiful carving, roughly six inches long, of a female figure. With pink hair.

  Fifteen

  Badru’s mother whispered something that sounded like swear words, but in Egyptian. I completely understood her feelings.

  Carefully I reached for the figure and picked it up. It was cold and heavy for its small size. The carving was exquisite; I could almost see every pink hair on its head.

  There was something else in the drawer that was only now visible. Holding my umbrella against my side with my elbow I reached in with my other hand and picked up a stone-handled black bladed knife.

  Quite to my surprise Badru’s mother sat down on the stone dais with a thump. Were these some holy relics I’d just found? Had I just desecrated some religious site?

  With trembling hands Badru’s mother reached out to touch the small figurine, quietly whispering to herself all the time.

  “What is it?” I asked her.

  Her eyes flicked up to mine and then further up to my hair.

  “It is you,” she whispered, awestruck.

  This was getting silly. It obviously wasn’t me, it was just some statue that someone had made thousands of years ago. I felt the urgent need to get back to sanity and away from this weird quasi-religious mummery. But before then I needed the answer to something. With the black-bladed knife I indicated the dog-headed figure carved into the wall behind me. “What is that?”

  Her eyes flicked upwards to see what I indicated, then quickly back down again. “It is a god.”

  I looked behind me, just to confirm that, yes, the pink-haired female figure was fighting a god.

  Just what I needed.

  Sixteen

  I didn’t notice the time it took for us to retrace our steps back to the camouflaged door, my thoughts were with the knife and the figurine that I just didn’t want to put down.

  As soon as Hasina saw the little statuette she looked like she’d swallow her tongue in surprise, luckily some harsh-sounding words from Badru’s mother prevented any of that silly fainting nonsense.

  Shemei met us inside the door and had a quick whispered conversation with Badru’s mother. I squinte
d my eyes closed against the harsh sunlight when the door was opened. The heat was quite something as well and took my breath away.

  Another question came to me and I tapped Badru’s mother’s shoulder to gain her attention. “Where were we in the pyramid? The Queen’s chamber?”

  “No. Sphinx.”

  “We were inside the Sphinx?”

  “Yes. Now we need to go.”

  “Oh, right then.” I thought it was just solid stone!

  The lady with the camels had moved a short way away to probably prevent awkward questions as to why she was loitering suspiciously next to a massive pyramid. Hidden by the camels we removed our robes and Shemei, Hasina and I remounted. Badru’s mother stayed with the other lady to more than likely let her know what had transpired whilst we were within the Sphinx.

  Shemei again led the way around the pyramid to rejoin our companions. I had several topics of burning interest to discuss with Sir Percival.

  Seventeen

  As soon as Sir Percival caught sight of us reappearing around the pyramid he turned his camel round and rode up to me. “Are you alright, Miss Lovelady?”

  “Ye–”

  “You really must be more careful in foreign lands.”

  “We–”

  “I don’t know what Mrs Miggins would say if anything happened to you.”

  “Bu–”

  “Well, thankfully you look none the worse for wear. Now back in line and no more shilly-shallying off heaven knows where!”

  He could wait. It would make the telling far sweeter if he realised he could’ve known sooner if he hadn’t had been such an old fusspot.

  ~*~

  The statuette and knife lay on the side of the bath on a towel. I had no wish to get them wet, nor for them to be too far away from me. This bath was different to the previous one, not that Shemei and Hasina were any less attentive, it was just that my mind was on something of far more importance and I needed someone who wasn’t already knee-deep in the situation to speak to about it.

  When I was ready Shemei again put some sort of decoration on my hair.

  I also got the feeling that they had turned into my bodyguards as they accompanied me everywhere I went; I even had to advise them in the most uncertain terms that I could go to the toilet by myself, thank you very much!

  I wrapped the knife and statuette in a wool scarf to both protect and disguise them, though I guess Shemei knew what they were (most intuitive that girl, in and out of the bath) as she made sure to wriggle between Sir Percival and myself at the low dinner table. As I didn’t want to discuss the situation in her hearing with him (even though she knew most of it) I kept mum and ate what she and Hasina fed me.

  Thankfully there was no entertainment laid on - I wasn’t too enamoured of the group from last night and I could imagine Sir Percival’s nightmares at what the lady made her stomach do, so there was a good chance I’d get to speak to him before he retired to bed.

  But my plans were waylaid by a massive yawn that crept up and pounced before I could adequately smother it.

  “Tired, Miss Lovelady?” Badru enquired.

  I managed to mumble, “Unfortunately so. But if I could have a few moments of Sir Percival’s time before he retires?”

  My overly heavy eyelids almost made me miss his nod of assent. Blackness seemed to be surrounding me on all sides. This didn’t seem to be my normal tiredness. I got unsteadily up from the cushion, using the table for balance and grabbed onto Hasina’s arm with enough force to make her squeal in protest.

  “Miss Lovelady?” Sir Percival asked, concerned, but seemingly from several hundred yards away.

  What was going on?

  I tried to speak but nothing came out. What could I do to make him aware of the situation? I let go of Hasina’s arm and fell to the cushion, grabbed the scarf containing the knife and figurine on the table and thrust it towards him.

  Blackness enveloped me.

  Eighteen

  Flickering torches lit the chamber and the faces of the women facing towards me on the throne. A weight was on my head and partly covered my eyes so I couldn’t fully see around myself.

  The dog-headed figure stood before me, but now I could see he was more wolf-like. He was massive, at least eight feet tall. Muscles gleamed on his shiny dark body, his head was covered with white fur, his red eyes gleamed at me and his fangs looked sharp and ready for action. Two muscular women stood either side of him, armed with metal blades, my guards.

  “Why have you come before me?” I said in a commanding tone.

  A snarl came from his throat making his words difficult to understand, “The Pharaoh wishes to see the end of us.”

  This I knew since he’d told me of his plans to rid Egypt of the old gods a while ago.

  “What do you want me to do, Wepwawet? The Pharaoh has his own mind–”

  “Speak to him,” he growled, interrupting me. A bad move - no-one interrupted me, except for the Pharaoh, and even he thought twice about doing it again.

  “No. Your time is at an end.”

  “Speak to him or your spirit will not find rest in the afterlife.”

  Anger flared, “You dare threaten me?” I hissed.

  His voice roared, “I am a GOD! YOU WORSHIP ME!”

  “Did, Wepwawet. No more. Take him away!”

  Before the guards could move he bounded up the steps towards me, snarling, a hairy muscular arm swinging from around his back with a knife in his hand. I was expecting this and brought out a stone-handled black-bladed knife. Guards either side of my throne leapt into action but were too weak to prevent his knife from punching into my chest, slicing my heart, just as mine severed his throat, his sharp teeth inches from my face.

  Screams filled the chamber.

  Nineteen

  I woke shuddering, adrenalin rushing through my body, my heart slamming like an out of control engine. Sweat stuck the sheets to me as I tried to kick them off, my throat felt raw like I’d been screaming.

  Desperately I looked around for attackers. I wasn’t in the chamber. Gradually my breathing calmed down and I became aware of a short black figure sitting at the bottom of my bed, Badru’s mother.

  “Wha–?” I croaked, then dry swallowed to moisten my mouth. “What is going on? What are you doing to me?”

  Her eyes were bright in the low gaslight. “Come,” she said, getting up and handing me a silk wrap.

  “Where?”

  “To get answers.”

  My screams must have woken the whole household as servants were wandering around looking worried and dishevelled in their sleepwear. Badru’s mother told them to go back to bed as she led me in a direction I remembered as being to the dining room.

  We entered and I saw Badru and Sir Percival sitting at the table. He quickly stood up and came towards me, concern on his hairy face.

  “Are you alright, Miss Lovelady? We heard screams.”

  “No, something is going on that I know nothing about, but it directly involves me.”

  “You mean the knife and figure you gave me?”

  “That’s part of it.”

  “She knows a lot about it,” I indicated Badru’s mother, and saw Shemei and Hasina enter the room behind her. “And I suspect Badru as well.”

  He turned to face his old school chum, “Baddy? What’s going on?”

  “You have the items, Sir Percival?” I asked. I felt the need to have the knife and figurine close to me.

  “Yes,” he turned back to the table and picked them up. They were resting on the scarf and looked undamaged.

  Quickly I took them from him, feeling slightly better now they were with me.

  Turning to Badru’s mother I said, “Speak.”

  “Please sit down,” Badru said.

  I made to sit on the cushion but the vivid memory of sitting on the throne and being killed made me quickly get up and walk around again, “Thank you, no.”

  Badru’s mother began talking, “Wepwawet is hunting your spirit�
�”

  “Wepwawhat?” I interrupted, as Sir Percival sat back down in surprise.

  “The wolf-headed god, the Opener of the Ways, is hunting your spirit for killing him with the sky knife,” her hand indicated the black-bladed knife I gripped.

  “Why?” I asked.

  “Um, who is Wepwawet? Don’t you mean Anubis?” Sir Percival said trying to show off his ancient Egyptian knowledge.

  We ignored him.

  “Before you both lost your lives he said he’d prevent your spirit from finding rest in the afterlife.”

  “But I’m not her,” I held up the statuette to show who I meant, then pointed it at my hair, “And this is just a side-effect of something Sir Percival gave me.”

  “You said you’ve seen the figure before?”

  “Well, yes?”

  “And you found the statuette and knife?”

  “So?”

  “Her spirit lives on in you. And he wants to kill it.”

  What nonsense was this? Perhaps coming to Egypt was a mistake. Maybe we should go somewhere sensible? Like Switzerland? I’ve always wanted to see a cuckoo-clock being made. I also hear they make rather nice chocolate.

  I looked at Sir Percival, “Does any of this make sense to you?”

  “Egyptians are rather fond of their gods. But you said you’d seen this god already? Where?”

  “When we arrived, in the dust cloud when the engine accidentally fired up again. It… looked at me.”

  He indicated the knife and figurine I held, “And you found those yesterday?”

  I nodded, “Yes, in the Sphinx.